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Cheney Eats Constitution

Washington – Vice President Dick Cheney said he needed something to cleanse his pallet after a particularly heavy first course, so he grabbed the United States Constitution, sitting on the table nearby, and devoured it. “There was no sorbet,” Cheney said. He was attending a White House dinner with various U.S. and foreign officials.

After he ate the document, Mr. Cheney, “Looked like he felt much better… He was certainly ready for the next course,” said an official who attended the dinner and requested anonymity.

The Constitution was apparently being passed around the table so each guest could have a chuckle, marveling at its quaint “rights” and “privileges.” Attorney General Alberto Gonzales, also a guest at the dinner, thought the document was part of the menu, and reportedly asked another guest what kind of fish “Habeas Corpus” is.