“Fuck It — Everyone’s Getting A Scented Candle.”

Across the country, shoppers braving the Christmas Eve crowds took one look at the number of people in the shopping malls and parking garages around them, and said, seemingly at once, “Fuck it — everyone’s getting scented candles this year.”

For many, the declaration came after weeks of procrastination, as they waited until the last minute to buy gifts for people on their shopping lists.

“I bought some gifts early, on Amazon and whatever,” said John McKenna of Providence, Rhode Island. “But for everyone else, I just kept waiting, and now it’s this,” he said, looking at the sea of people walking through the Providence Place shopping mall.

“I’m not dealing with this nonsense,” McKenna said. “Look, there’s a Bath & Body Works or whatever the hell it’s called right there. Fuck it. Everyone’s getting a scented candle this year.”

McKenna ended the interview and walked quickly to the store, several yards away.

In Burbank, California, Melissa James was coming to the same conclusion.

“Oh, my God,” she said as she entered Macy’s from Burbank Town Center shopping mall’s parking garage and was instantly met with a wall of shoppers. “I was hoping it wouldn’t be this bad. This is awful.”

She walked through the mall, weaving through the people as best she could. “There’s gotta be a Bath & Body Works around here. I think there’s one right outside Macy’s. So, you know what, fuck it, everyone’s getting a scented candle. They want to complain, that’s fine. I don’t care. This is madness.”

Harv Tomlinson of Evanston, Illinois needed gifts for his mother, aunt and grandmother. He was hoping to get personalized, unique gift this year, for a change, but he “kept putting it off” and ran out of time. Now, he has little choice, as he enters the parking lot of the Lincolnwood Town Center in his Honda Civic, and comes to a stop instantly. At least 12 cars wait for a spot ahead of Harv. He’s already had enough.

“What’s that store called where you get the candles?” he asks through his open car window. “Bed, Bath & Beyond? No, the other one.” Bath & Body Works, he is told. “Yeah, that place. That’s what I’m doing. I’m not sitting in this and then dealing with the zoo inside, looking around for hours on end. Fuck it. They’re all getting a scented candle.”


Evidence Photos Prove Michael Brown Hit Darren Wilson So Hard, He Almost Left A Mark

Photos released by the St. Louis County Prosecutor’s Office of Officer Darren Wilson, taken shortly after his altercation with 18-year-old Michael Brown on August 9th, 2014, appear to prove that Brown hit Officer Wilson so hard in the face that a mark was almost left on Wilson’s skin. In one of the photos, the skin above Wilson’s right jawbone is possibly reddened slightly.

“What these photos show, I think, is that Mr. Brown hit Officer Wilson in the face with such force that a little red mark was left there,” said St. Louis County Prosecuting Attorney Robert McCulloch. “That kind of inflammation of the skin is something that is not to be tolerated, with regard to the faces of law enforcement officers.”

In an interview with ABC’s George Stephanopoulos, and also in his grand jury testimony, Wilson described the punches Brown hit him with as so powerful that he might not survive even one more of them.

“The next thing was, how do I survive?” Wilson said in the ABC interview, referring to the moment following the first series of punches. “I didn’t know if I’d be able to withstand another hit like that.”

Wilson’s grand jury testimony contains a very similar passage, where Wilson says, “I felt that another of those punches in my face could knock me out or worse. I mean it was he’s obviously bigger than I was and stronger.… I’ve already taken two to the face, and I didn’t think I would, the third one could be fatal if he hit me right.”

According to Josh Lovett of UCLA Medical Center, Wilson had reason to fear for his life.

“I mean, look at the results of the other punches that landed,” Lovett said. “They resulted in a mark that may in fact be reddening of the skin, and maybe even some puffiness. That’s scary stuff, especially for a law enforcement officer. Very scary.”

In his press conference following the announcement that there would be no indictment of Officer Wilson, McCulloch, the prosecuting attorney, sought to point out the fact that Wilson’s skin is especially sensitive.

“I would say it’s obviously above average in terms of its sensitivity,” McCulloch said. “You can see it in the photos. Now, I’m not saying the irritation Officer Wilson’s skin suffered at the hands of Michael Brown justifies the shooting, but I do think people need to take extra care when getting into altercations with law enforcement officers who may have skin sensitivity issues, like Officer Wilson clearly has. Any contact could cause more inflammation, more swelling than it would on someone who doesn’t have the same sensitivity issue. And I think that needs to be taken into account.”

McCulloch had previously taken the unusual step of releasing all of the evidence seen by the grand jury, because, he says, he wanted the public to have all the facts. He says part of the reason he took that step was precisely because of issues like Officer Wilson’s sensitive skin.

“I want them to see the whole picture, not just selected snippets that they’ve gotten from social media and elsewhere,” McCulloch said. “Things aren’t always cut and dried and simple. This may appear to many to be a case of a police officer overstepping his authority, because he shot an unarmed teenager. But then you look at these photos, and you say, ‘Whoa, wait a minute. This officer has a skin sensitivity issue. I didn’t know that before.’ And that may affect how you see the situation from then on, because now you have all the facts.”


70 Percent of NFL Players Either Concussed or Suspended Indefinitely

New York – Seventy percent of active NFL players are either concussed or suspended indefinitely, according to a report released by the Organization for Football Safety, a nonprofit organization based in Chicago, Illinois.

The report notes that the NFL has 1,696 active players, so the seventy percent finding means that approximately 1,187 players are either concussed or have been suspended indefinitely due to legal troubles and other off-the-field issues.

Concussions have become a huge issue for the league, and a recent report produced by the NFL itself estimates that a third of its former players will develop a neurocognitive disease like Alzheimer’s, or some other form of moderate dementia.

Of the 1,187 players, nearly half, or 587, are currently concussed, having experienced a collision in preseason or the early weeks of the regular season that caused a significant head injury.

The other half are suspended indefinitely, either by the league itself or by an individual player’s team.

Baltimore Ravens running back Ray Rice, for instance, was suspended by the league after video surfaced showing him punching his then-fiancee Janay Palmer in the face while the two were inside an elevator.

Adrian Peterson, the Minnesota Vikings running back who was indicted last week on one count of reckless or negligent injury to a child after he allegedly struck his four-year-old son repeatedly with a tree branch, or switch, was suspended by the team. This was a reversal of course, as Peterson had been reinstated by the team just days earlier.

Commissioner Roger Goodell has come under fire over the past several weeks for his lack of appropriate disciplinary action early on in the Rice case, and for his denial of having seen the tape of Rice from inside the elevator before it was released by the gossip website TMZ.

On Friday, Goodell met with reporters to address the figures in the Organizations for Football Safety’s report.

“This report is obviously alarming and troubling to everyone in the NFL family, including myself,” he said, in a prepared statement. He did not take questions from reporters. “But what it also shows is that thirty percent of our players are not concussed or suspended, and that’s a pretty good number. Having said that, you can rest assured, we’re going to work as hard as we can to make that number grow as much as possible in the future.”


Report: Boys Will Be Boys, Then Become Men Who Hit Women in the Face

A report released by the Heinz Center for Family Research finds that boys will be boys, then grow into men who often hit women in the face and engage in other abusive and violent behavior. The report is part of a larger study which tracked the behavior of hundreds of American males from the time they were toddlers up through full-grown adulthood.

Tim Reinhold, lead researcher on the study, said the study’s results, as outlined in the report, were remarkably consistent across the board.

“We found that boys whose violent or aggressive behavior was dismissed as just ‘boys being boys’ as young males later became men who hit women, hurt women, abused others,” Reinhold said. “Most of the time, the target was a woman.”

As an example, Reinhold pointed to one of the individuals tracked by the study. This man, who was referred to as Subject 12, acted very aggressively as a boy, stealing the belongings of other children and breaking their toys and other possessions. He especially targeted girls.

When any of the girls complained to teachers and others about Subject 12’s behavior, and these people relayed the complaints to Subject 12’s parents, the response was always, “Boys will be boys.” It was Subject 12’s mother who made the statement most often, but his father said it as well on the rare occasion that he appeared at the school.

Subject 12 grew into a star athlete in high school, but misbehaved often and was the target of complaints by fellow students regarding bullying and other similar incidents. When his parents were confronted with the complaints, the response was, “Well, boys will be boys.”

In college, Subject 12’s athletic career blossomed, as he became a star running back on the football team. He was also the subject of complaints on the part of at least three women who claimed he had been violent with them and made unwanted sexual advances. When the coach of the football team was asked about the complaints, he replied, “Everyone knows boys will be boys.”

After a failed attempt to play professional football, Subject 12 was twice arrested for domestic violence. His wife, who later divorced him, was hospitalized on the second occasion. When police interviewed Subject 12 about the incident, he said, “Hey, boys will be boys, you know?”


Racist Longs for Bygone Days When Police Brutality Wasn’t Recorded

Lynbrook, NY – Patrick Dunlop, a 78-year-old retired racist, finds himself bemoaning the loss of a simpler time, a lost era, the era that he grew up in.

“Everything was simpler then,” Dunlop said. “A kid could walk down the street by himself. A man was a man. There was none of this videotaping everything. It was a simpler time. A better time.”

The issue of our current generation’s obsession with documenting everything they do on ubiquitous cameras raises Dunlop’s ire most, in fact. Specifically, the trend of videotaping police officers — whether it’s a dashboard camera recording an officer pulling someone over, or a cellphone camera capturing alleged abuse, Dunlop wishes all the cameras and easily-accessible video equipment would disappear.

“This is just absurd, all this video-taping of the cops beating people up or whatever it is,” Dunlop said. “In my day, this type of stuff was going on, but we didn’t know about it. We didn’t have to hear about it. I didn’t have to watch it on the news. And it was better that way.”

Doesn’t he think it’s better to know what is actually going on in the world, rather than living in ignorance?

“No, not at all,” Dunlop said. “I’m a racist, first of all. I thought I was clear about that. So, why would I care if it’s going on, and why would I want to know it’s going on? Second of all, ignorance is fantastic. Ask any ignorant person. It’s the best. You can live your life and do your thing and not have all this morality and ‘this is bad’ and ‘that’s bad’ and what have you stuffed in your face.”

So, does he think it doesn’t matter that there is police brutality going on, and that in many cases, it’s directed towards black men?

“I’ll tell you the truth, most of these guys, they deserve it. That’s my opinion,” Dunlop said. “Now, you have to take into account that I’m a racist and I’m also ignorant, but that’s how I feel about it.”

Dunlop wishes the world could be the way it was when he was growing up in the 1950’s and ’60’s. Beyond not hearing about racism-fueled police brutality, he didn’t even cross paths with many minorities for much of his formative years. And that was perfect for him.

“For an ignorant racist like me, it was the best time to grow up. It really was,” he said. “I just wish it could be like that again.”