President to Outline Plan to Outline Plan

White House spokesman Scott McClellan announced today that President Bush plans to unveil “an outline of his plan to create an outline for a plan” during a nationally televised address Sunday night. McClellan said the address would “make clear the President has a clear and discernible plan for creating a bold, far-reaching outline for a plan.”

“This president is decisive, and he is a man who takes action,” McClellan said during a press gaggle this afternoon. “He is committed to doing whatever it takes to outline plans. And this address to the nation, I think, will prove that he has a clear plan for outlining his plan.”

Meeting with reporters shortly before boarding Air Force One, the president said, “I plan to outline several, uh, several plans I have for outlining several things. I’m going to make a bold outline towards the goal of getting a real, firm outline together. That’s the leadership the American people want, and the one they deserve.”

McClellan’s exchange with the White House press corps grew tense as it drew to a close, when reporters pressed him for more details about the president’s address. The following is an excerpt from today’s press gaggle:

Question: But, Scott, what is it that the President will be outlining Sunday night? What specifically?

McClellan: Well, as I said, Terry, he will be outlining a broad and far-reaching plan to outline a broad, far-reaching plan. I think I’ve been more than clear on that point already.

Q: But what is the plan?

McClellan: See, I thought I said this already, Terry. The plan is an outline, as I said, for a future plan of an outline. It is far-reaching, and it is bold.

Q: I understand. But what will it refer to? When you outline something, you usually have a subject that you’re outlining.

McClellan: Not necessarily. You know, when you’re a child, you draw an outline of something on a piece of paper, right? It’s just an outline. You’re just drawing. You don’t know what it is. You’re eight. You don’t have a specific ‘subject’ or ‘goal’ or whatever catchphrase you want to attach to it. You just have your little outline. Well, this is like that, but it’s a big outline, and it’s the president. And it’s bold. And far-reaching.

Q: What are you talking about?

McClellan: I’m talking about outlines. What are you talking about? I’m talking about solutions. I’m talking about plans.

Q: You’re talking about drawing something when you’re eight.

McClellan: No, I’m not. You are.

December 2nd, 2005 by